08.31.08
Posted in Rants & Laments at 2:17 pm by Deb
I'm trying real hard not to know you. But I know from what little contact I've already had with you, that you're going to break my heart. Maybe not today. Maybe not even tomorrow. Maybe not even for years. But you will.
I'm trying real hard not to look into your weepy eyes, to see your starved little body, to listen to your incessant crying. Trying not to see that you remind me of TC, who's been gone all these years. Trying not to find a place for you in this already overflowing haven for your kind. Trying not to think of what will happen when I take you to get the care that you need, and find out that you might just be beyond care. Trying not to imagine having to bury you with all the others who have broken my heart, either tomorrow, or 15 years from now.
I'm trying real hard not to hope that your brothers and sisters will just go away. To hope I won't see or hear their cries anymore, so I won't be the one who has to deal with them and have four more heartbreaks, since you were the only one I was able to catch.
I'm trying real hard not to curse the ones who did this to you. I want so much to punish them, to make them pay, to send every evil thought I've ever had their way for doing this to us. Because now, it's you AND me.
I'm trying real hard–and it is soooo hard– to pray that they will see the error of their ways, spay your mother, and become responsible pet caretakers instead of ignorant assholes who dump sick kittens by the side of the road.
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08.26.08
Posted in Work in Progress at 4:23 pm by Deb
Been scrambling around trying to come up with some lower priced items for the Arden Fair and FaerieCon. So here's a herd of Water Horses in the rough epoxy armature stage:
I've also got some shell people in the works–you can see them in the lower right corner. Some will be magnets, some pins, some standalone sculpts.
I've even manged to use up some of that "ethnic brown" prosculpt clay. Won't buy that stuff again–the color is just too flat. Looks like a tootsie roll. Bleah. Took some serious paint work to give this "African Shell Goddess" some depth.
And here she is finished:
I ended up getting a lot more detailed with her than I originally planned. I was thinking she'd be a $25 piece, but now I'm thinking maybe $35. I know I put at least 4 hours into her, way more than I'd planned.
Got to get to work on the rest of them–Arden Fair is Saturday!!!!
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08.25.08
Posted in General at 7:51 am by Deb
I finially found the lyrics to a Collin Raye song I heard on John Ritter's "Rise Up" radio show years ago. We used to listen to it on regular radio (before we got satellite) on Sunday mornings while waiting for the Jeff Foxworthy show to come on. Even though it's a Christian song, which is something I'm not usually into, the message is there about how plans change, and sometimes unanswered prayers are a blessing.
Wanna hear the song? Go here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RuIC3WnMRUQ
I knew all the answers
The way my life should go
And when I used to say my prayers
I would tell God so
It seemed He wasn't listening
I thought He didn't care
But lookin' back
It's plain to see
He was always there
'Cause I prayed for strength
And I got pain that made me strong
I prayed for courage
And got fear to overcome
When I prayed for faith
My empty heart brought me to my knees
I don't always get what I want
I get what I need
I'm not sayin' that it's easy
Or that it doesn't hurt
When nothing seems to go my way
Nothing seems to work
These days I'm getting better
At goin' with the flow
Accepting that sometimes the answer
To a prayer is no
'Cause I prayed for strength
And I got pain that made me strong
I prayed for courage
And got fear to overcome
When I prayed for faith
My empty heart brought me to my knees
I don't always get what I want
I get what I need
Every time I've had a door slammed in my face
In time a better one was opened in its place
I prayed for strength
And I got pain that made me strong
I prayed for courage
And got fear to overcome
When I prayed for faith
My empty heart brought me to my knees
I don't always get what I want
I get what I need
Oh I don't always get what I want
I get what I need
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08.19.08
Posted in General, News at 6:18 pm by Deb
Ahh, the wonderful thing about being unemployed–time to get things done that have been sitting for way too long.
I present:
The 2008 Harps on the Beach T-shirt design.
And also available: The Official Harp Schleppers Local 412 t-shirt
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08.15.08
Posted in General at 10:27 am by Deb
Well, week one of my life outside the cubicle went by in a blur–spent Monday and Tuesday scrambling to get my stuff ready for the Doll EXPO in DC. I was there as part of the OOAKGuild booth. Stressful and unsucessful-at least for my dolls. The Guild did ok, however.
OOAKguild booth
It wasn't all bad–I met several of the personalities from the online forum, and we put together one helluva presence for the Guild. The Guild made a big splash, even getting notice from Jones Publishing who runs the show.
On a personal level, I didn't sell anything, which really didn't surprise me, but it was an expensive lesson in where my stuff belongs. My dolls kind of got lost in all of it–we had 35 artists represented and over 170 dolls in that space. The 13 dolls that did sell, now that I think of it, were ones that stood out–not that they were better quality than the rest–some were a real surprise to me. But they were the ones that were wildly different, splashy, colorful, or unusual. And they were mostly bought on retail night by store owners, not collectors.
My guys at expo
I got to see my stuff in relation to so many others, kind of lost in the shuffle next to some really big, really sparkly fairies. But I suspect they still would not have sold, even if I had my own table. Many people have been going to that show for years, and haven't sold a thing. I smelled a lot of politics, and some cliqueishness there. Some of them seem to go just to socialize for the weekend and hob-knob with the big names. Then there's the crazy "dead baby" collectors who buy up outrageously priced life-size bably dolls and push them around in strollers, change their diapers in the ladies room, and even pretend to breast-feed them. It's really creepy.
'Nuff said…
Many lessons were learned at this show.
1. READ SHOW CONTRACTS CAREFULLY. We were stopped at the door and told we had to pay $120 per car for the UNION people to unload our stuff. We weren't allowed to bring it in ourselves. The union "bouncer" even had the balls to tell us that it was "a very reasonable sum" for having someone unload for you. Yeah, maybe if it were a CHOICE, not extortion. Bloody pirates.
2. THINK TWICE BEFORE ROOMING WITH A BUNCH OF PEOPLE YOU'VE NEVER MET. We had two rooms between 8 people. We artists tend to be toward the lunatic fringe anyway–put us all together in a couple of little rooms, and well…let's just say I spent an afternoon listening to music in my truck in the parking garage just to get away from one particularly annoying individual. But some people were better than great, and I'm glad to call them new friends.
3. GOOD ENOUGH ISN'T. I was particularly embarrassed to have brought some of my older stuff–the hands on them are shamefully badly done. When I saw the detail in Mollamari's stuff, which is the same scale as mine, I really felt like I had no business being at a show like that. I took detailed photos of her stuff to put up over my worktable to remind me that I need to reach for that "next level."
4. THERE'S ALWAYS SOMETHING TO BE LEARNED. I learned a lot from a number of people that weekend, things to do, things not to do, and some very useful ideas for my own art. I especially enjoyed Mark Dennis' "Expressive Faces" workshop. It answered a lot of questions I had about face alterations, especially open mouths with teeth. I might even be tempted to try a doll in a larger scale after his class. Although I didn't take her workshop, I was interested to find out that Diane Keeler makes her beautiful hands the same way Mark showed me last May at his "sculpting party." I had some degree of success with that technique when I re-did the hands on Pitti-sing. Definitely a technique I need to explore. Mark mentioned that he liked my faces, especially the 40 Fairy, but said I needed to work more on hands. Which I do, indeed. Although the people on the OG are very encouraging and nice, it's great to have "real" criticism from a pro.
5. PRESENTATION IS EVERYTHING. Something I've always known, but this show clearly illustrated it. Without the fabulous sign graphics, brochures, business cards, and table set-ups, we could have come across like a bunch of amateurs who should have stayed on the porch. Even with 35 artists of varying styles, sizes and skill levels, we managed to look like professionals, thanks to Carrie Kendall, graphic designer extraordinaire! And Debbie Weimert, who dealt with all the artists, handled all the submissions from around the world, and made all the arrangements–they pulled it off in a major way.
Although for me it was stressful and unsuccessful for sales, it was a learning experience. I'm not sure I'd do it again–I'm starting to think I'd be better off sticking with the miniaures market and craft shows. I need to make a living doing this if I want to avoid returning to the cube-farm, and it just seems a bit expensive for a "social" weekend.
NEXT: The Arden Fair, August 30th. I need to get some lower end crafty stuff done for that one–I don't think most fair-goers will understand the OOAK doll thing or the prices. I might try to get a couple more G&S dolls done for the Ardensingers crowd, but I need to do some goofy jewelry and some Breyer repaints, stuff like that. Then, on to FaerieCon in October. I have a feeling that one could be a big moneymaker if I have a good variety of stuff and prices.
243.8
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08.01.08
Posted in General at 11:38 am by Deb
Heard this on the way in to my last day at the Big Bad Bank today, and it instantly wiped away the creeping doubts from yesterday.
You can spend your whole life building
Something from nothing
One storm can come and blow it all away
Build it anyway
You can chase a dream
That seems so out of reach
And you know it might not ever come your way
Dream it anyway
God is great, but sometimes life ain't good
And when I pray
It doesn't always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway
I do it anyway
This world's gone crazy
And it's hard to believe
That tomorrow will be better than today
Believe it anyway
You can love someone with all your heart
For all the right reasons
And in a moment they can choose to walk away
love 'em anyway
God is great, but sometimes life ain't good
And when I pray
It doesn't always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway
Yeah I do it anyway
You can pour your soul out singing
A song you believe in
That tomorrow they'll forget you ever sang
Sing it anyway
Yeah sing it anyway
I sing
I dream
I love anyway…
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